22 Days Left

Do you ever have those days where you’re super busy all day and yet nothing gets done?

I make to do lists and I accomplish a lot but some days it feels like I’m spinning my wheels and not moving. Today was one of those days. Yesterday was one of those days. I feel like I’m running out of time before the kid comes and I’m torn between wanting the kid to show up at the end of Spring Break and wanting it to come the week after on the due date. (Or even later to make returning to school a breeze… Finals week and be done? I could do that)

I’m also hoping I recover quickly. I have been saving tasks to do for when I’m home on maternity leave. I know I won’t have much time and won’t feel up to doing a lot but they are things to get me out of the house. I want to walk the block. I want to take the dog to the dog park for exercise. I want to walk at the zoo. (Cause it is the zoo!) I want to go shopping for sunglasses. (Yep… it is on the list lol) I want to work on this blog some more, maybe listen to some trainings on how to improve my followings? I don’t want to go stir crazy if I’m stuck with a kid on my boob all day. Will I actually be able to do these things? I don’t know. I don’t want to aim too high but I also don’t want to just use the baby as an excuse to not do anything. I know I’ll have to start slow but I have to start somewhere, right?

My gym membership is currently on a medical hold so we aren’t wasting money while I can’t go. Pregnant ladies CAN go to the gym! But I am not one of those ladies. Between the exhaustion and the nausea and everything else I’ve had to deal with, it just wasn’t in my cards and I had to accept that. But I SO want to get back. I pass a CrossFit gym tutoring sometimes and I just want to go back. I miss feeling like I could do things. I miss being able to roll over in bed and not have to huff and puff. I miss being 45 lbs lighter. I miss being able to sit up without rolling to the side! Just the simple things!

But I have to accept that I’m at a point I can’t and instead look forward to when I can do it all again. When will that be? I don’t know. The optimistic part of me says I’m going to pop out a kid and the next week be at the gym! The realistic part of me says by the end of June is my goal.

Funny thought: I was thinking one day that I could do a spin class to get back into the gym. I could go at my own pace. I wouldn’t have to stand, I would be sitting. Sounds good till I remembered how uncomfortable bike seats are already, couldn’t imagine how it would feel soon after birth! Lol I think that will have to wait a while…

Pretty much at this point I am just annoyed with how much I WANT to do but physically can’t do and it is driving me crazy! The list of items I can do and NEED to do also keeps growing and no matter how hard I work on the tasks they just seem to multiply. People and students are worried about a quarantine from school and my view is currently “Bring It!” so I could get stuff done…

Anyone else feel this way?

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